Season 3, Episode 2: Andy's Hookhands

  • Justin “Cardboard” Bieber
  • Momz
  • Rachel v. Shelley in the Octagon
  • The Cool Guy Sports Podcast
  • Kennedy jokes
  • The Doily Podcast
  • Boiling chickens
  • Adam cooks!
  • The Buccaneer Podcast
  • Sponsored by Andy’s Hookhands
  • A song about pants
  • Hookhand gloves

Bonus: We Forgot About this One

  • A year later. Al Green still here. 
  • Lumberjacks: water or road?
  • Canada does not have trees
  • 17 spider babies
  • Sigourney Weaver buggies
  • The flu is incredibly cool
  • Good ol Daddy Chris!

Season 2, Episode 7: We've Devolved

  • Global Warming: A Fifth Season!
  • Optional's been visiting Portland for like 3 months now. 
  • The Bell is Back!
  • Butter?
  • Cuba Gooding, Jr.
  • Vanessa’s Current Events
  • No Dead Air Beef Taco
  • Blade Runner: 2049 jet stream SFX sponsorship 
  • A Death: Rachel’s Sparkly Shoes
  • Why are all the nerds named Mark?
  • Count to Ten: A Musical

Season 2, Episode 6: Bells, Clowns, & Feudal States

  • We have no idea how this starts.
  • The bells of the world.
  • Tinker? Tink or Bell? Liquor?
  • Cow bells. 
  • The Announcement. 
  • Rachel: The Bit Killer
  • Current Events with Vanessa
  • Babe Ruth is uh-strikin’ out
  • Vacuum Episodes
  • A New Drama: The Clown Rivalry
  • Samuel tells us about Feudal States
  • Clown Nomenclature
  • Dorky HP teams
  • Oh, Optional’s still here

Season 2, Episode 5: We Go Live!

Facebook Live is GREAT for podcasts
Ol Optional himself is here!
Taco Bell “Bong” SFX
Khaled’s still a thing?
Burnt Banana Bread n’Butter
A Game: “Al or Al?”
Hear that LaFleur?
RIP loses to everything
Auditing the Intro Song
Muddy hip hop vs lumberjack workers comp

Season 2, Episode 4: We Made a Soap Opera

We love it. Amen. 
No Dead Air: The Soap Opera
Our pool of “Fashion Bits” is shallow
Socks are Pockets!
Al “Optional” Green joins our live audience
We lean back when we laugh
Laughing without Smiling
Chomping Teeth
“I’m Dying” selfie
Bits in our bits
Pant Scratch Hypnosis
Optional: The LQ expert
Optional and BopBop’s friendship story

Season 2, Episode 3: Check out our Bits

Rosh, Jaych, Whatever
NOT sponsored by La Croix
Always always
But actually Sometimes always
The Nagel Neighbors
Peephole R&B
Sponsored by Marshall Mathers LP
Spaghetti Bits
Our bits sponsored by Cialis
Or maybe just Outro always.

Season 2, Episode 1: Ibarelynozen

Forgetting the Intro: I hear that’s a great way to start a season
"A Trick for the Ages"
Microwaves don’t cook meat
Still no intro
Bathroom Stalin
Just a bunch of clowns
I guess this is Season 3 ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Landed the Bieber sponsorship
Rand him. 
The Stuff Store
Nighttime Safari

Season 1, Episode 7: Using our Mouths to Talk

When the Intro Song is way too long. 
We are definitely using our mouths to talk. 
Kinda St. Patrick’s Day episode.
neil dedork tyson amirite
the bitcoin bit
The Great Self-Noogie Debate
Barely know her? Rachel takes the throne. 
Potted Plant Hottakes
A word from our sponsor. Thanks!
Mouth scratchin'
And that’s a wrap!!

Season 1, Episode 6: For Mormon Ears Only

Intro Song: It’s a thing, Remember?
For our Mormon listeners. 
Josh’s “Smoking” Jacket
Misogynistic high-fives? You decide!
Mitch Romney
Polygamy high-fives
Air Crouch & His Real Cool Airband!®
Finally, the Stitch/Shrek impression you’ve been waiting for
Please draw our thing
Beat our ass in court, Tony!
Meat hand between two bread hands making a hand sandwich
The Relativity of Dynanacism  

Season 1, Episode 5: Apparently it's the Valentine's Day Special

Intro Song? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
No Dead No
Ovaltine’s too nice to sue
We barely know Little Annie
Crunchy Leaves in the Mac & Cheese
Best…leave…stories? We don’t know.
Mr. Tingle: a VERY cool guy
Mars and gutters and m&ms and where does powder come from
Rick & Morty Stephen
We barely know thim (sic)
Uh…the Valentines’ Day special
We don’t know what we’re doing
Sharing headphones
Does Barry White have an estate?
Winged, wung, wang?
“What happened here?” I guess it’s a new bit
Live Studio Audience